Truth be told

I’m having a harder time keeping all my balls in the air than I let on.  Sometimes it feels like everyone and everything is moving at a normal pace all around me yet I’m living in slow motion.  Can I make it through all this?   

My finances have taken a sharp nose-dive into oblivion.  Normal, daily routines seem to have no purpose and feel burdensome.  Sure the chemo has it’s effect, but this has so much more to do with my present mental state.  I’m really struggling to find the level of focus neccessary to prepare for surgery.  In the end, hopefully it will all be good.  It’s the going through that hurts.  Baby steps, baby steps.  Face the fear!

Zombie mode

Aside from stepping out my front door to greet my brother, sister-in-law and nephew on my front porch, I’ve been held up inside riding the wave of bad days.  Movies and TV galore.  You can never see enough Law and Order SVU.  I did rent “Warm Bodies” on PPV.  I have to say, I’ve been sick of the overkill of zombie movies in recent years, but Warm Bodies was a refreshing surprise.  Love the angle of corpse’s point of view.  Loved it! :-D  Feeling better and plan to be to my old self tomorrow.

On another note, diet plan has been difficult.  It seems what I desire most during bad days is fruit.  Citrus, water-filled fruit!  May need to rethink cutting fruit altogether.